I can safely attribute every single negative outcome of my life that happened over the past year to 1 thing:

Giving faith in the outer world to create a good future for myself.

In life of a teenager, this is a huge trap.

You’re basically chasing external conditions that are completely out of your control & deluding myself in belief that they’ll make me happy.

Friends. Hot guys (or girls). Parties. Looks. Popularity. You probably know that.

Don’t get me wrong:

I sometimes fall for these too, but as I’ve been progressing throughout my business & self-improvement journey, I’ve became increasingly aware of one truth:

That the external conditions can only bring short-term pleasure. The real happiness comes from within.

That means…

I’m the happiest not when I’m surrounded by a group of friends, or going on tons of parties or just having 1 best friend I can fully trust.

I’m the happiest when I’m

• learning

• building

• reflecting on my progress

Not attached to anything or anyone.

Simply going with the waves, letting each day create a whole new, enjoyable reality for myself.

This Is What Robs You Of Your Potential

Social conditioning is dangerous.

And here’s why (and how it works):

People (including you & me) hold on to beliefs not because they serve them personally, but because they serve them socially.

Meaning, they help you give a feeling like you fit into a tribe, when in reality, you don’t need to. This is just an echo of your unconscious mind that’s been programmed to always prioritize survival (and tribes mean survival).

As a result, you project onto yourself beliefs, thoughts & habits that might be hurting you in the long-term, but your mind cares only about the short-term effect:

Having a tribe of people.

And that’s why it sometimes becomes so easy to believe that we need the outer world to be alright in order to be alright on the inside.

You’re Not Yourself

When you think of it, your entire life, you’ve been living as everyone else but yourself.

You’re just product of your environment. Of the social conditioning we’ve talked about a minute ago.

I like the way James Clear puts it:

“Environment you live in is like an invisible hand that shapes your behavior.”

That’s the best analogy:

You’re a clay, and the environment you spend your time in is a sculptor.

And when you don’t take control of the sculpt…you won’t have control over the entire sculpture.

I don’t know about you, but this idea scares me to death - the idea of spending my entire life as someone else, never trying to tap into my deeper potential. The idea of something I don’t have a full control over designing my life.

If this scares you too, then treat this letter as your own call to action.

Call to become your own sculptor. Reinvent yourself. Authentically.

The Path Of Self-Actualization

If you take The Path of Self-Actualization, you take full ownership of your thoughts, habits & income.

Nobody in this world is going to have the potential to make you happy or miserable, because you’re going to be the one in charge.

You won’t compare yourself to other people, because you’ll be busy living your own extraordinary life.

You won’t have to be stuck in a job you hate anymore, because you’ll be building your own business based on things you’re obsessed with.

But I warn you:

It’s going to require taking a bold step into the unknown. At first, it’s going to be scary. But once you get more comfortable, you’ll feel power.

Self-independence.

Freedom.

Whatever you name it…this is what we’re after.

And now it’s time for me to show you how to conquer it.

Let’s get into it ↓

The 3-Step Path To Self-Actualization

The 3 steps are:

1. Self-Awareness to take control of your thoughts

2. Self-Improvement to take control of your actions

3. Self-Productization to take control of your income

1) Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is a superpower, because you can’t improve or fix what you aren’t aware of.

That’s why cultivating this skill is going to be crucial on the path toward reinventing. Heck, I can’t even stress far enough how important this was to me.

At this point, self-awareness essentially means two things for us:

1. Becoming aware of your flaws

2. Becoming aware of the fact that they aren’t really “your” flaws

Let me give you an example from what I’ve talked about previously:

I’m aware of the fact that I’m not living a life most people of my age would call “good”.

But I’m also aware of the fact that the idea of what is good life or bad life is determined by other people, not me.

From time to time, whenever I hear a thought that I’m failing at something or that I’m simply not being favored by external conditions, I ask myself:

“Was that their voice, or was that me?” (shout-out to Glass Animals for inspiration)

Overtime, you’re going to realize that most of your thoughts aren’t really yours.

They’re just a result of everything you’ve soaked in your mind over the course of your entire life (going back to the concept of social conditioning here).

Remembering this helps you uncover the real underlying problems. Sort of like first principles thinking.

You need to find the real, underlying cause of why are you facing what are you facing.

For my issue with not thinking that my life is good & comparing it to others, the underlying cause is not being “selfish enough”. Aka not working on myself to an extent where other people’s lives aren’t important to me.

If you want better answers, ask better questions.

2) Self-Improve

You’ve become aware of your flaws.

You’ve realized that they aren’t the real flaws.

You now know the underlying cause behind them.

What do you do now?

You have a problem standing in front of you. It’s time to solve it.

But…in your own unique way. That’s why we’re also building that self-awareness practice:

It allows you to get to know yourself better. As they say: You can be your own therapist, advisor or best friend, because you’re the only one who has the potential to get to know you the deepest.

The reason why conventional advice might not work for people at times is because it’s too generalized.

But you’d never find 2 people who would have an identical way of achieving a goal or solving a problem.

Try to create your own personalized solution.

E.g.: I’m doing this every single week. You might say that I’m being very selfish with my deep dives because 99% of the time I write them to solve & gain clarity on my personal problems…but it’s just a pure truth.

And I write them in a way that makes me happy, tying it to my favorite life experiences, mantras, etc. I’m just writing in a way that I’d love my friend/therapist/advisor to talk to me when I need help.

And you can do the same for you.

Solve your own problems.

Test different systems.

Start with tinier problems.

And then you progress.

Solving your own problems in private is self-improvement.

But we want to go a step ahead, and do it in public instead.

And in that case, we call it…

2) Self-Productization

We all know that: If you want to take control of your income (while doing what you love) corporate jobs aren’t probably the way to go. Or at least that’s what I’ve been (ha!) conditioned to after spending a lot of time on Twitter in the past 2 years.

The point is:

When you solve your own problems in public, you are also attracting people who might potentially face the same problem.

“But I’m not an expert in solving this problem!”

You think I’m an expert on self-awareness, social conditioning, or psychology?

Hell no. But creating online isn’t about being an expert. It’s about being able to nurture those a few steps behind you. I’d staple this to my desk if I’d be starting out btw.

At the beginning, you’ll solve tiny problems in forms of content.

But eventually, you’ll start solving bigger, more pressing & more burning problems, and since the amount of money you make is directly proportional to the urgency of problems you’re solving…your income is going to grow simultaneously with yourself.

That’s how it works: Your personal brand or your business should be an extension of yourself.

Of course, there’s nuance to this.

But if you engrain this type of building an income for yourself, everything changes.

You don’t have to worry about your future anymore, because it’s secured.

But only if you take this path.

So what do you say?

Are you ready to explore a whole new world?

Will you stand up or do something after reading this letter, or are you going to switch back to living in your comfortable bubble?

I don’t know what you choose.

But I’m sure you’ll see the consequences of your choice in a few years.

With all that’s been said, that’s it from me today.

Talk next Sunday,

— Claudia “On The Path Toward Self-Actualization” Stellner

P.S.: Don’t forget to catch some sunlight today ;)