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On Handling Rejection, The Art of Having Conversations & Writing
Claudia’s Digest #022
Claudia Stellner
February 11, 2024
Things I Liked This Week
Lessons from 1,000 days of practicing spirituality → Read here
How to examine your life like an ancient philosopher → Watch here
29 non-obvious lessons George Mack would give to his younger self → Read here
3 HIGH-IMPACT IDEAS
1) When in Doubt, Ask
James Clear in his latest 3-2-1 newsletter edition:
"Always ask, but never expect.
Always ask for what you want. Many people are happy to help—if the request is direct and specific. In a surprising number of cases, something remarkable is possible if you have the courage to ask.
Never expect people to say yes. Everyone is busy and balancing multiple priorities. Your request is not their responsibility.
When you're told no, move on lightly and freely. The world is full of opportunity."
If you want to be successful, there are millions of situations where you’ll have no other option but ask.
It can be a piece of advice. A testimonial. A podcast appearance.
But you just can’t sit around and wait that thing is going to magically appear in your hands.
Yes, it’s terrifying - but the reason you are terrified is because you think that there’s something wrong with you when people say ’no’.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned about handling rejection, it’s this:
It doesn’t always work out. But when it does, it works exceptionally well.
If you ask, it’s not your fault that you’re told no.
But if you don’t ask, it’s your responsibility that you don’t get what you want.
2) Listen to Remember
For the past month or so, I’ve been diving deeper into the art of having awesome conversations with people.
The major lesson I learned:
We’re living in times when the amount of connections we make with others is on the rise, yet the quality of them experiences a huge downfall for the same reason.
People who are present in conversations & treat it as a means to an end are rare.
I noticed it both in others (and in myself) - but it’s work in progress.
Make people feel like they’re the only person in the world, and you gain an unfair advantage for life - both personal & professional.
P.S.: The idea comes from this tweet:
Listen so deeply that you can tell their story like it’s your own.
Breathe deeply. Sink into your body. Lock into their words, like you’ll win $1M if you remember all the details.
Listen to remember — and watch how people light up when they see you.
— elle ✨ (@ellebeecher)
4:42 PM • Feb 7, 2024
3) Post & Ghost
The line above has gotta be the greatest piece of writing advice I ever received (h/t: George Mack).
Don’t wait to see people’s reactions.
Instead, follow your own gut. Your mood. Your curiosity.
That’s when the best writing happens - when you commit to playing your own games, not the algorithm’s games.
In a world full of noise (= content “for the engagement”), writing that comes from the heart becomes the signal.
Most people haven’t figured this out yet - but don’t wait until the day they do.
Post and ghost.
People are rewarded in public for what they practice in private.
FAVORITE QUOTE
People who are terrified of what others think about them are actually terrified of all the negative things they think about themselves being reflected back at them.
Alright, that’s it for today!
Talk next Sunday,
– Claudia